I've got a crush on Ed.  Nevermind that's he's in his eighties, is happily married to a stunning woman named Mary, has grown children, several grandchildren, and I suspect, a few great grandchildren . . . I consider Ed to be my boyfriend. 

When we run into one another, he quietly ambles over to me for an obligatory hug and a peck-on-the-cheek and then I watch him settle down with his coffee and some cookies and wait for whatever pearls of wisdom his years have bestowed upon him.  My evening is truly not complete without this affectionate exchange.

Here's the part that really gets to me and melts my heart . . . Ed always smuggles a few cookies into his pocket for later on. Perhaps he's taking them to his beautiful bride, or maybe they are consumed on the car ride home prior to his arrival.  No matter, it's an endearing action; this desire for a little treat after the fact.  Or as my mother would say, "sweets for the sweet." (Ed definitely qualifies.)

Here's how "treats" translate into the world of Real Estate and can really "sweeten" the deal.

Currently, I am in the middle of a transaction; one in which my Sellers received several offers and are now in contract with a lovely family from San Leandro. (Great news!)  Even better, these aggressive Buyers quickly moved through their inspections and met their contractual obligations in quick time, releasing ALL of their contingencies within a few short days.  As you might imagine, this kind of integrity always makes the Sellers very happy and in return, they responded by "gifting" their trampoline, the lawn mower, and a few other incidentals at NO CHARGE to the Buyers.  Now that's generous, not to mention very smart on the Sellers' part.  

One Buyer I represented several years back, referred to these courtesies between Buyers and Sellers as "throwing in the mats;" a term I've never forgotten and relied upon often. (Michael is a partner at BMW, SF and Mini Cooper so it was a natural analogy for him to make, but thank you just the same for an astute observation.)

In my opinion, "throwing in the mats" is always a wise move in a market where Sellers are typically seeing results far beyond their expectations and Buyers are feeling a bit battled and bruised before, during, and AFTER the offer date. (Sellers, take heed, Buyers are beginning to drop out and push back in response.) BTW this holds true even when (especially when) the successful Buyers have the winning bid that undoubtedly required UPPING the ante. Despite, or because of the pace, it has probably never been more important to finish off your transaction on a "sweet" note.
 
​The last thing a Seller wants is for the Buyer to move into the house after the close of escrow and start nit-picking at every flaw and defect they now discover (no matter how much disclosure, there will be unknowns) OR worse yet, come back to the Sellers with a formal demand by way of a lawyer. (Say what?)

So take the few extra moments to meet with the new Buyers and familiarize them with the sprinkler system and the other components of your former home, leave behind your garage door openers and keys, the numbers for the gardener and the handyman, as well as the warranties on your appliances and hot tub, AND take it from me, a nice note and a bottle of champagne are never a bad idea . . .

When Cliff and I took possession of our house in Piedmont several years ago, the previous owner left a long list of contacts, from dry cleaners to the dog walker to the furnace repair man and ALL of it was appreciated as we were new to the area and hadn't a clue.  They'd also left a beautiful bottle of wine and a card. (They'd wisely ended the sale on a "sweet" note.) A week later, when we discovered that a large redwood tree on the property would need to come out immediately or we'd lose the out-building that was destined to be Cliff's home office, it never occurred to us to double-back around to the Sellers (or the agents) and ask them for the money.  There was no blame to assign and we now owned a house in an incredible setting (yes, with majestic Redwood trees and all that entails).  Forget real estate, in life, it's important to recognize the gift.

Conversely, I've witnessed Sellers and Buyers become so polarized during a transaction over the smallest of perceived offenses that they never make their way back to a cordial working relationship (You're irrevocably damaged because someone sat on the bed or turned on the remote control? Really?) In these cases, both parties invariably feel slighted and upset and you better believe both sides start looking for reasons to walk away from the deal, negotiate on price, or in the worse case scenarios - drum up a lawsuit designed to teach a lesson.(Eww, that hurts.)

I ask you, isn't a little treat a lot easier?  Aren't kindness, courtesy and good intentions a better way forward?  They've certainly served Ed well. (Take as many as you like, Ed, your secret's safe with me.)

My dog and I are at an impasse.  I want him to quietly lie in the garden and Buck wants to dig holes. I respond by planting more shrubs in the shady areas he loves and he thwarts me by finding another spot in which to dig. I can't say I appreciate being "out-foxed" by a dog. In fact, I find it rather frustrating, but he's a dog, and dogs DIG.

Unfortunately, I don't think this is a battle I am likely to win, given that I'm at work all day while he's got free run of the yard, but I'm not entirely willing to surrender either. Thus, he digs, and I plant - each of us trying to "out-fox" the other.

The truth is, no one likes being out-foxed in any situation and it's especially difficult in today's marketplace where Buyers are rarely alone at the table and are often compelled to spend quite a bit more than they had anticipated.  If you're not lucky enough to be Midas, it can be rather frustrating to watch home after home go to more aggressive (or richer) Buyers who can waive their inspection and appraisal conditions and close in mere days, as opposed to several weeks.  Shucks!  

"This whole process seems rather obscure," one Buyer recently confided. "Why can't I know what the other offers are so that I could decide whether or not I want to pay more?"    Gee, wouldn't that be nice for us all?    

Buyers would be able to quickly decipher whether or not they could realistically compete and their Realtors could save a tremendous amount of time NOT writing offers that probably don't stand a chance under current circumstances (Hmmm. . . it may be worth considering).   

Of course, I'm not sure that Sellers who have now realized tremendous gains  and are in possession of a unique commodity, would benefit from open bids as much as they do from a closed process - nor necessarily, would Buyers . . .   Typically, when multiple offers come into play, there is often a clear winner; one that is usually well ahead of the rest of the pack.

It's not that the winning Buyer has "overpaid" for the house; it's that savvy Buyers understand the nature of the contest and are willing to set themselves apart in order to avoid a "multiple counter" response; one in which the decision is likely to become a popularity contest (at which point, they'll have NO control over the outcome).  In short, these educated Buyers want the house and are willing to set the market value to get it.   

Conversely, when only one offer is up for consideration, the Buyer usually has the advantage of bidding below the list price (once again, Buyers are setting the market value). And while that doesn't necessarily describe our current marketplace here in the Bay Area, it's important to remember that markets are cyclical and we've just come off of several tough years where Buyers have had the upper hand. Even with the dramatic shift, there are still many communities outside of the Bay Area where homes can still be purchased for less than asking (what a concept).  

Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on how you see it) this is the Bay Area, and given that you WILL in all likelihood, be bidding against several other Buyers on almost every home this Spring, it helps to have a Realtor who understands the nuances of the game, knows the other players in the mix, is well respected by his/her peers, and clearly understands the standard practices in each specific marketplace. (Take my word for it, terms vary greatly from region to region.) Without these advantages, you may find yourself  "out-foxed" and at a real disadvantage.  

Recently, I have spoken with several Buyers who have struggled with saying good-bye to their out-of-area agent, in order to work locally. And while I appreciate the strong bond created in the search for a new home, your loyalty will probably come at a heavy cost to you and perhaps, in the form of missed opportunity.  (Just because I vacation in Tahoe, doesn't mean I know the marketplace there.)  

By way of illustration, a few months back, I received a preemptive offer on a listing here in town, e-mailed to my inbox from an out-of-area agent who probably thought they had "out-foxed " the rest of the buying public by declaring early. (They hadn't.) Nearly everything with the offer was wrong, from the price, to transfer taxes, to their demands. At which point, their offer was politely declined and when a slightly modified offer was resubmitted come the offer date, it was declined once more - a repeat rejection. (Ouch, that really hurts.)  

The truth is, their offer missed the mark on every single level  - and the worse part of this story is that their agent probably didn't even know what mistakes he had made.

So if you have changed your geography by more than a few miles (I'm talking different cities, not different neighborhoods) it's probably time to reconsider your representation.  If you are still feeling torn, ask your Agent to make the referral, which gives him/her an opportunity to recoup a little of their time and some of the lost commission. Granted, it won't be the same pay-out as a full sale's commission, but you're much more likely to actually achieve the intended goal of home ownership, and that should be your Agent's goal for you as well.  Otherwise, we're all just digging holes.  

So plant your garden. . . our spring market is in full bloom and it is thriving!